I had always been longing for a shield to protect me from people’s scrutiny and criticism. I long had wanted an armor to make me invincible from voracious social predators who were satiated by gnawing every inch of confidence in me and found satisfaction every time I faltered. I had been groping for every possible way to build a self  free from bustles and hustles of having to socially contend for respect and to race with social rodents in seemingly obsessed yet vain attempts to demand acceptance.

I had become a socially insatiable and pathetic individual whose refuge from damnation was to blame others for having created a vengeful individual in me and to console myself that everything around me went wrong. I was the only one who went right. For years, I was in a social recluse trying to figure out things through isolation.

“Does everyone get to experience this?” This was the very question that haunted me as if life should have not come into existence if it were the way it was.

With the passage of time, I have realized that the world I had and the life I had lived blocked all of life’s tributaries towards its fullness. I thought of moving on yet I was uncertain where to start and was instead taken aback.

Such obscurity had brought me to reflective reckoning and deep contemplation yet I had no idea where i was heading for.

I started with forgiveness. I learned to forgive those who have made life miserable for me. I forgave those who imposed on me unjust treatment. I then started having friends and went out with them. I opened myself to opportunities meeting people. I read a lot of materials that have something to do with living a great life. It didn’t take me that long to embrace and appreciate the beauty of having people around me. I learned to trust them. i learned to share with them. I learned to confide them my deepest thoughts and sentiments.

Yes, it was a great awakening and transformation. I am thankful to God for having extended to me another chance to live my life the way I should live it.