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 How do you explain to a ten year old, that even though your daddy looks like he is sleeping, he has actually passed away and is in the lovely arms of Jesus? He tells everyone in ear shot that he doesn’t want Jesus to hold his daddy, but he want to hold him. Talk about breaking ones heart.

 How do you explain that this is how life is, and sometimes we don’t have answers for everything; in a way he can understand. The bottom line is you cannot, you need him to mourn, cry, express his anger; then when his fits of unhappiness begin to lessen; and then you can take the time to answer some of his questions. If after he asks you questions, it just may be a great time to ask you child some questions, and letting him know how your feeling. It is very difficult for a widow, and his or her child to go on after everything is over, and everyone has gone home but as we learn in life; we must continue. Some people can be unconsciously callous and say “well don’t worry life goes on”. None of us want to hear this. It is the time that both take the time to laugh and cry together; and as the pain lessens, it is at this time when you as his parent can reminisce about the good times. It is always a great thing to teach your child that whenever he wants to speak to his dad, all he has to do is set the tone and speak from the heart, Dad or Mom is always there, just not the way we want them to be.

  I believe that those we lose to death, is always there for you, just not the way we want them to be, we can’t hold them anymore, but we can turn to them during hard times.

Keep their memory alive in your heart; and your love one will always be with you.