I had never been great with relationships, I usually let myself get controlled and bent to whatever my partner’s greedy desires had been Until I met her. She came to my school from Lithuania i was 17 she was 16, when my eyes rested on her, she was the reason that every breath left my body afterwards and the soul goal for every beat my heart took. Imagine my delight when I was asked to show her around make her comfortable, it actually made going to school all the more bearable.

I’m a guy so obviously masking my feelings, was the only road to go down. Now I think I should mention at this point that I was already in a relationship, a 2 year one to be precise, more like a trap than a relationship a constant barrage of grief and put downs that lead to even bigger arguments, I think it was only the thought of being alone and the feeling of security that kept us together for so long.

One night preparing myself for another onslaught of my girlfriends wicked tongue I walked to meet her and imagine my surprise when I see Deimante the Lithuanian girl from school. My heart skipped a beat like it did every time I was near her, a hug from her was a glorious assault on all the senses. The smell of her perfume, the soft touch of her hands and warm smile on her face seemed to make the edges of the background smudge together until there was only one thing clear in my vision, her.

A few weeks later my partner finally decided to call it a day, leaving me with a confused and mixed sense of relief and emptiness. The first week was surprisingly hard for me but what was even more surprising was the fact that my ex’s best friend Jennifer was the only one there for me at the time. We became close, I needed someone or something to keep me from going insane. Deimante and I became really close friends, there was always something more there but no one dared ventured over that line, we became accustomed to our friendship although when Jennifer came on the scene Deimante reacted in a completely out of character manner. Flirting and holding my hand but I didn’t pick up on the signals so I continued getting closer to Jennifer until inevitably the kiss came and we became a couple.

This obviously didn’t bide well with Deimante. I seen less and less of her even though I tried every excuse possible to get close to her, to be near her, to pick up that scent that left my nostrils tingling and begging for more. The relationship with Jennifer quickly went down hill and from there on got on worse. We fell out on New Years Eve when I was heading out with friends I had just landed a job at my local news paper and had money and was willing to spend. I rang Deimante on the off chance we could talk over a drink and that she would maybe tell me why she was being so distant she accepted to my delight. The sickening nervous feeling settled in nicely, a feeling I sort of missed, a feeling that only really ever happened when I knew I was for seeing her. I don’t know why but when I saw he she looked more beautiful than ever, maybe it was the cold slap of reality setting in that I cant have her and that someone else could, and with her looking as good as she does the chances were becoming extremely high.

(To be continued)