When I gave birth for the first time, I was unfamiliar with the security policies in effect within the hospital to protect the babies and their mothers.  The first night after my daughter was born, I was faced for the first time wanting to do something that required me to arrange supervision for my child if I couldn’t watch her myself.  It was only to take a shower and I couldn’t bear to send her away even for that short time, but I was certainly uncomfortable leaving her alone in the room without my attention, so I pulled her basinet into the bathroom and locked the door.  After I got into the shower, I was clumsy enough to accidentally pull the emergency cord and naïve enough to think that a simple apologetic explanation would keep a team of very aggressive nurses from trying to force their way into the bathroom despite the lock on the door and my desperate efforts of assurance that I was okay.  No matter how many times I relocked the door, they turned the master key, insisting they needed to see me in person to be convinced.  I asked them if they also needed to see me naked as I didn’t usually wear clothes in the shower.  I also pointed out that the emergency pull cord should be accessible, yet not so inconveniently positioned so as not to cause an accidental pull bringing on the toilet police.  My tone of voice and presence of mind apparently convinced them, and they gave up, but I was never careless enough to touch the emergency pull cord again.  I was thankful that my daughter didn’t make any sounds for a few moments, as I don’t know they would have approved of bringing bassinets into the bathroom, as they certainly didn’t impress me as the type to approve of much.Being a mommy isn’t anything like I thought it would be.  When I first found out I was pregnant with my oldest child, I walked around for weeks thinking all sorts of negative things.  I kept thinking of the convertible I was never going to have again and the trips I was never going to take.  Not having planned the pregnancy, I thought of it as more of an ending than a beginning.  Then she was born.  What an incredible experience, looking at her for the first time.  I remember them taking her over to the bassinet to suction things out and wipe things off and swaddle her for the first time.  There was an unbelievably inconsiderate nurse standing in the way whose uniform I kept tugging at until she finally got the hint to move.