Fuck you. [Fade to black. Everyone is laughing at James.]

Sandtrap Games

Episode 2

New Girl in the Canyon

script

[Scene begins with Tusa crouched near the radio tower, with a charged Plasma Pistol aimed at the base of the tower. Mandy, Sarge and James are standing close by.]

Tusa: When I say “Now”, throw a Plasma grenade at the base of the tower, then I’ll shoot it with this Plasma Pistol. The energy from the grenade and the overcharge should be enough to get the radio going again.

James: [Moving next to Sarge, facing the radio tower while he moves.] Five bucks says this doesn’t work. Ten bucks says Tusa dies.

Sarge: You’re on.

Tusa: [Turning to James] I heard that, @$$hole. [turning back to the tower, and backing up some] Now Mandy![Mandy throws the grenade, and Tusa shoots the tower when the grenade lands. the grenade explodes, and a voice is suddenly heard to be coming out of the radio.]

Radio Voice: -is Flight 203, requesting permission to land. Repeat, this is flight 203, requesting permission to land, over.

Sarge: You own me 15 bucks, dirtbag. [turning to the radio] Flight 203 this is Sandtrap base south. You have permission to land, over.

Radio Voice: Roger Sandtrap Base South, Flight 203 coming in now.[a hornet flies into view, and touches down near the warthog respawn. A SPARTAN (steel and yellow) hops out.]

Kate: Hi. I’m Corporal Kate Farno.

Sarge: I’m the Staff Sergeant of this base. My name is Charley Mason. Sandtrap crew, assemble and sound off!

[Tusa, James and Mandy get in a line. Tusa steps forward]

Tusa: I am Major Domo Tusa “Vuranamee. [He backs up, and James steps forward.]James: Private James Delorval, ma”am [He backs down, and Mandy steps forward.]Mandy: Private First Class Mandy Jordan. Pleasure to meet a soldier that isn’t an asshole.

James: I know that you’re talking about me. Stop talking about me.

Sarge: This god-forsaken little hole in the sand is Sandtrap South Base. So soldier, what military training have you had?

Kate: Training? What the fuck? I have to have training? I just stole the armor, and hotwired a chopper.

Sarge: You WHAT?

Kate: Just kidding. I’m trained in intelligence and heavy weapons. And Bullshitting.

James: They… trained you to take a shit like a bull?

Kate: No. Bullshitting is the act of making up totally bullshit stories that are somehow believable, like that one, in case you screw up, or something bad happens that no one is allowed to know about.

James: Ohh.

Tusa: Dumbass.

James: Shut the fuck up.

Kate: [to Sarge] Lots of tension in this place.

Sarge: Both of you shut up, our you’ll be on tripmine teabagging duty again.

[Another SPARTAN (purple and blue) walks up]

Cookie: Hey, I finished lunch. Anyone want some?

James: Sure.

Cookie: Too bad, I ate it all. Like I said, I finished lunch.

James: Fatass.

Cookie: Dumbass.

Sarge: Cookie, how many times have I told you not to eat all the food?!

Cookie: 1..2..3.. Exactly 568 times.

Sarge: Well, make it 569. STOP EATING ALL THE GODDAMN FOOD!

James: Why don’t you do something useful?

Cookie: What, like kill you?

James: Fuck you.

Cookie: Go fuck a rock, you geophile.

Tusa: Geophile. [sniggers]

James: [Walks away grumbling, then yells] I hate you all!

Sarge: Good, now that he’s gone we can have our new recruit party.

[Camera goes to James, who is standing on the west bridge of South base that is closest to the North base.]

James: Man, what the hell did I do? Ever since I got here, people have been treating me like shit.

Evil Voice: You don’t deserve this kind of treatment..

James: Who’s there?

Evil voice: You should get revenge.

James: How?

Evil voice: Let me help you.

James: How do I know I can trust you? I can’t even see you.

Evil voice: Look to your left. [James turns right] No, no, your left.

[James turns left. An Elite (steel, steel) is standing there.]

Reka: I’m Reka Jasalnim. Today is your lucky day.

[she begins to laugh evilly. Fade to black]