A very fun to read, new parody of a true writing classic. A novel full of innuendos and plot holes thought, created, published, and ruined by me.

Hermonkey on the other hand was touching her fuzzy little pet….. aardvark..(haha gotcha).
As they got nearer and nearer to the supposed school Shaven saw the scenery change multiple times first bright and sunny with not a single cloud in the sky, then snow and a few minutes before their arrival it was raining cats and dogs….. so much blood, oh the humanity.

When the train stopped Shaven, Hermonkey, and Blob all got off the train and proceded to a giant room. The magical cealing gleamed with what seemed the outside world with clouds, sun, birds chirping and wondered how such a thing was even remotely possible, that is until he realized that the roof was still under construction.

Before Shaven could utter a word an old fart at the end of the room started talking about a bunch of stuff which Shaven didn’t care about. He just pointed to them and decided which Fraternity/sorority they would be in, whether it was PeterGriffinmore, Smellerin, Handcuff, or Crownail.

He along with Hermonkey and Blob where all sent to PeterGriffinmore where the fraternity package awaited them. Shaven found a very expensive wand made out of magical wood from a not so magical tree and the pubic hair of a cross dressing phoenix. he also found a pair of broken x-ray specks and a used condom under his pillow which he later used as a holster for his wand. Hermonkey found a wand which doubled as a thundermaster 9000 class G vibrator and a 12volt battery to power it.
Blob on the other hand found an ordinary tree branch with the words “magic wand” written on it with whiteout.

All their books appeared before their very eyes on their bed sheets. This year they were going to study the basics of the wizarding world. The first books were:

  1. Invisibility cloaks and why not to use them to spy on chicks in the shower
  2. 101 other uses for your wand
  3. Divine Urination and the trouble with incontinence when you turn 872
  4. The life of a horny pre-pubescent wizard
  5. Yellow River by professor I.P. Freely

to be continued…..

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