When families are broken, it causes emotional despair for the children.

The parents use the children as buffers, and problems arise. It causes the children to make bad choices, choices that they regret further in life, such as joining gangs or doing drugs. What are parents getting from fighting? From what I see they’re not gaining anything, just more problems.

When families are broken children get entangled between their parents’ emotional issues. How do broken families affect me? From when I was 10 years old, my parents began fighting. I’m still not clear as to, what the main issue for this fight was. A broken family affects me because it changed who I am today. I play a big role in my family because I am the oldest of 3 children; my sister is 10 and my brother is 6. Since my father doesn’t live with me, I play the role as a father. I look after my siblings when my mom is at work, which is the night shift.

I am not ready to play the role of a father; looking after my siblings, making sure they’re being well behaved, and that they eat their food. I am only 15 years old and not ready to do this kind of things, but when life hits you hard the only thing to do is stand back up. The results of these fights were a dramatic change. My parents used to be happy together; we would always talk and have fun at the dinner table, my sister and I would always listen to our parents.

Now, it’s like the opposite of that. My sister mouths off to my mom and there’s a lot of tension in my household. I’ve seen so many changes within myself and family members. I’ve noticed that my marks are slowly decreasing in school because I think about what happened and how my life has changed, which gets me side-tracked. My whole family’s attitude was changed. It seems as if I don’t know them anymore. Parents don’t realize the emotional pain they put children through.

It’s like when they’re fighting they hold you in front of them as a shield and let you take those emotional blows in your gut. These kinds of emotional blows hurt you inside and remain with you, where as physical blows heal. It’s hard to stop thinking about these problems. I tend to stay in my room and watch TV as a distraction from the fighting. My mom always seems stressed, probably because she thinks about it too. When she’s mad she takes it out on me by making me do the chores or just yells at me for no apparent reason. It’s hard on me because I sometimes think it’s my fault my parents are fighting.

What causes a family to become broken? I personally think it’s the misunderstanding and lack of trust in the relationship. The parents are causing more problems when they fight. I don’t want to show my emotions to my parents because I believe that they won’t care because they’re fighting without thinking about how we feel. I’ve noticed that in the media, children turn out making bad choices because of emotional despair.

What bothers me is that if you tell someone what your family is going through, they stereotype you because you have a broken family. When someone doesn’t have a dad, they think you’re going to make bad choices in life, because you don’t have a father figure to guide you through situations in life, which only a father figure can do. In many movies I noticed that when there isn’t a father in the family, the children grow up doing drugs and getting involved with the police. I would cry myself to sleep from thinking about what happened and how I have changed as a person.

I am always in a happy mood, and it helps me not think about it. I don’t want anyone asking me what’s wrong. I tend to stay in my room so I’m not brought into the fights. I’m positive that in the future all this won’t happen to me because from observing I’ve learned that trust and understanding are the main things that keep a family together. Personally, this experience of having a broken family has made me more mature, and a more understanding person of how families are.

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  • momabiz on Jul 29, 2008

    Because I had such a dis functional family I feel what your saying. But I now like to look at people and see if they are crying out in silence.I watch peoples actions and how they carry themselves and always draw a conclusion in my mind.People think I am strong because of what I have gone through.I just have compassion for people that wasn’t given a chance because of there up bringing. It’s always great when you see a fighter come out of it!click on my publications on momabiz

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