Was that another complaint? Is he unsatisfied with something else? Wouldn’t be the first time. I can’t make out the words, but I can hear his muffled voice through the heater vent in my room. It’s not the best eavesdrop station on this route to misery but it does the job. As long as the heat isn’t on and running through the old dusty vents, that just makes it harder to listen.

He calls us the snakes, my sisters and I. It’s just the two of now, my little sister and I. You could say the oldest slithered out of the nest; couldn’t take the crowded polluted air any longer. If I was smart, I wouldn’t let this air contaminate my mind anymore. That’s if it’s able to be ruined anymore.

I’m not so sure anymore.

I don’t think I ever was sure. About anything.

I mean, what can you be sure of anymore? Nothing. You can’t be sure if you meet someone you will love them. You can’t be sure you won’t get pregnant if you have sex. So the condom box says 99.9% effective, today that means what? Exactly my point.

The only way to be sure is to not take part in the daily attributes of life. Lock your mind, body, heart and soul up under lock and key. The fact is, if you don’t you’re gonna get hurt. When someone tells you you’re going to be fine, chances are you won’t be. They say all the time you can’t choose your fate. Yes you can; say no to everyone and everything. That way noting good can happen, while at the same time nothing bad can happen either. When someone asks you “what’s new?” and you tell them “nothing” it’s a good thing. If nothing happens, nothing bad can happen. Therefore you just controlled part of your fate.

I wish I had better control over my fate. If I did then maybe I wouldn’t live in a jail, a penitentiary. Obviously that tells you I don’t. Either I don’t know what exactly I want or I contemplate things too much. The first part would be a lie. I do know what I want. I want to be and not worry about being criticized for beliefs. What amendments that again? Ah- well I don’t remember, but it’s one of those. And I want a lot more things, but I wouldn’t want to bore you. Chances are I already have and if I kept going you would be asleep by now