Normally, he only knocks off one packet and rushes back to me, laughing and giggling. On this occasion though, an elderly lady had just walked about the corner and had startled him. Tyson squealed with excitement (always a good sign with autism) and knocked off another packet, even though I was asking him to come to me.  Well, the elderly lady stopped, glared at Tyson and told him that he was a naughty little boy and to go back to mummy – to which Tyson knocked another packet off the shelve, all the while laughing and squealing and giggling.

By this stage, I had pushed the trolley to where Tyson and the elderly lady was. By this stage, you could see that she was not impressed. The look she gave me was one of total disgusted. I was informed that I was a bad mother for letting him ‘destroy the supermarket’. Then she told Tyson off again!

Thankfully, I have come to expect this behaviour. After all, Tyson is a big boy so it is reasonable for people to react like this. However, it doesn’t make it any easier when it does happen.  I listened attentively to what she had to say, being polite and holding my tongue.  After what felt like 5 mins of being told why I was a bad mother (seriously, that is what she was telling me!), I stopped her to explain that there was one very important piece of information that she didn’t know, that she couldn’t possibly know, even though she had probably raised 6 children of her own.

And that is that Tyson is autistic – he has an intellectual disability.

Yep, you guessed it, she tried telling me that that was just an excuse, that he isn’t autistic (I just love that one, NOT!) and that I couldn’t possibly know anything.  I just simply smiled and said “whatever you reckon, love. After all, I am his mum and I am the one who has taken him to DSC and the Autism Association as well as to every other Tom, Dick and Harry here in Perth but, hey, what would they all know? What do I know? I should have just come to you, seeing as you are such an expert on everything.” 

I didn’t know if it was what I said or the way that I said it (with a huge, cheesy grin and a lot of sarcasm) but it was enough to get an apology out of her. Phew!  Why people feel the need to do that, to make themselves feel better than other people, simply amazes me.

I just thought I should mention that the supermarket I take the boys to, all of the staff know us there.  I have been told lots of times not to get too worried when Tyson starts knocking things off the shelves. Most of them there know that both boys have autism. They really are the best supermarket in my suburb =)

Now, it’s not just the elderly who voice their opinion about children with autism, it can be anybody.  The main thing is not to get upset about it. I use sarcasm and big cheesy grins as my way of putting people back in their place. If that doesn’t work and they continue to step over the line, giving the ‘the look’ is normally enough to stop anyone in their tracks. 

There has only been one time when ‘the look’ hasn’t worked – that was the time I just looked at them with lots of pity, shook my head slightly in disbelief and just walked away.  Sometimes that is the only thing you can do……