Day 1: Oct. 15Th

After 30 long days of soul searching, detoxification, 12-step meetings, tears, frustration, joy, confusion, cravings, party dreams, insomnia, and utter internal chaos they let me go.  I spent my last night at New Bridge as if it were a summer camp that i knew i would be returning to at some point.  To say i was nervous would be the equivalent of calling Michelangelo a sketch artist, an existential understatement by all accounts. 

Life had been easy for the last month.  Days were mapped out with groups, scheduled eating periods, and opportunity to complete assignments.  No life changing decisions needed to be made on a daily basis.  The big bad world had no choice but to wait on the outside while we learned how to fight and prevail over it. 

No sooner than i walked out the door “the big bad world” shot me a reminder that i wasn’t in Kansas anymore.  Accomplishing a complicated project or lengthy endeavour would usually be rewarded with a drink and/or a celebration.  **sad face** I slumped down in the backseat of my roommates car like i was hiding from adoring fans in a crowded parking lot. 

FOR THE FIRST TIME IN MY LIFE I REALIZED HOW BIG THE WORLD WAS AND THAT MY LITTLE PART IN IT ONLY MATTERS AS MUCH AS I BELIEVE IT DOES

I got home without drinking.  Made it to the mall to purchase a long board without drinking.  Rode my board for a few hours without drinking.  Made it to bed with a smile on my face and my sobriety.