I’m not sure when it was, but I can remember getting to a certain age and realising that some of the adults I was talking to were actually idiots.

Not in a bad kind of way, but just realising that they didn’t know it all like I’d previously thought. School had probably drummed some kind of respect for authority into me and I guess I kinda looked up to my elders and expected them to know everything. I’ve always looked up to those people that seem to be intelligent and get kinda drawn in. Like a nice big brainy glowy bubble. Or something like that anyway.

It was a bit daunting I suppose when I realised that things in life don’t always work out for everyone, even if you’re a nice person, and you try really hard. Some people don’t get that big break and good people die, for no good reason. I’d like to think that growing up I’ve got a little wiser to some things. I’ve managed to avoid most bad things, like spots, and try to be decent where I can, like turning veggi.

I got a little bit older again, and still not fully realising, I expected people I thought should have known better; the adults, the authority, whatever you want to call them, I didn’t think that sucking up and ass kissing really worked. I guess I thought that everyone else felt the same about the people that laze about and expect to get places because of who they know and not what they did. Once again, I was shocked to learn that you can trick someone quite easily and get a nice little deal out of things yourself if you work it well enough.

Working out who you are and what kind of person you want to be can be quite hard. I know you don’t choose who you are, but you’ve got to make your own decisions in life.

I’m a student. I’ve chosen to be a student. I eat the wrong foods because I can. I roll out of bed whenever I feel like it. I drink too much alcohol and sometimes I don’t do my essays until the very last minute. I fall asleep in most lectures and turn up to tutorials hungover. Sometimes probably still drunk.

I like to take little breaks between lectures. I like the hours on campus I can kinda be myself and plot out my day. Last week I was having a hot chocolate with a friend when I saw a guy that takes me sometimes for tutorials. I think the thing that impresses me most about him is his age, he seems so young and so bloody brainy. Mr Leibniz. I wonder what he’d be like if I got to know him though. It’s funny how quickly you can form an opinion and how quickly that can be altered.

Well, sometime last Monday all those things intermingled. I’m pretty sure there is a God. Someone is definately up there out to get me.

When I say I make my own decisions and I eat what I want, I generally mean I get a spoon and get stuck into a jar of nutella, occasionally a bit of popcorn and more often than not just down a jar of jalepinos. Combined with a staple diet of alcohol this generally ensures I have a pretty good night, but most of the time I’m oblivious to the world around me.

Walking through Wind Street last week, happily plastered, I noticed a familiar face. There he was. My Mr Leibniz. Making his way through town. Naturally, my little Brain-Box Aura went to work, and drunkely I stumble over to him for a great big hug.

Of course, the guy is my lecturer.

My course has around 200 people.

He has no idea who I am.

Trying to defend himself from his drunken stilleto clad attacker he lurges backwards. I stare at him in horror.

“Don’t you know who I AM?” I declare. He looks at me blank. With further explanation obviously needed I continue “I’m the one that’s always hungover! Don’t you remember me?” The poor guy tries to head away. I am entirely merciless, “Hey, we didn’t have a tutorial this week did we?”

“Er, if we did, I didn’t go….” Happy with his responce I decide to plague him once again.

“So , you have a good night? You’re off home early. Are you drunk?” It’s approximately nine o clock on a Monday night.

“Uhm, no actually, I just, er, went to the cinema with some friends….” I suddenly become aware of two other men oogling me in disbelief.

I just hugged my lecturer… He tried to escape… I yabbered at him… He tried to get away… I carried on… He’s not even drunk… His friends are laughing at me… HE’S SOBER…

I think that’s round about when the ground decided to open up and eat me. Or not. This is why there is a God. The ground did not open up and I was left there, face to face with Mr Sober Leibniz. It was much crueler.

I’d developed a spot that day and everything. A little reminder of childhood in a time when I needed to act like an adult.

Tomorrow morning I have a tutorial with Mr Leibniz. It’s quarter past one and there’s never been a better time to get pissed. Then again, maybe I’ll wait until around six o clock and make sure I’m just ticking over enough to get through the humilating ordeal.

I have a lot more respect for those idiots now, when I think about how life can sometimes turn out.