The other day I was on the receiving end of some particularly odd road rage. After another car tried unsuccessfully to zoom around me because he was in the wrong lane (right turn only, he wanted to go straight like me), the driver got pretty upset I was, you know, driving in the correct lane in front of him and couldn’t hit my magic invisible button so he could ream up my car’s bumper though a red light…

At said red light, I looked in my rear window and figured I was about to get “The Finger”. Instead, I see a middle-aged man rapidly opening and closing his hands, jazz-hands style, over and over in the air. This man is not giving me the finger, so is he giving me the…fireworks???

I turned to my husband Phill and said, “I am so sick of other people’s craziness. I am going to take it to a new level. Come Halloween I am investing in some Harry Potter glasses, a stick, and a blanket. And the next person who goes nuts on me while driving? I am going to get out my “wand” and wave it at them screaming ‘Petronusssssss!!!” And then if they have the courage to continue freaking out on someone who thinks they live in Hogwart’s, I will pull my blankie around my shoulders and tell them ‘Invisibility Cloak! You can’t see me!!!’ Tell me, who is going to mess with that?!?!”

Phill actually says to me, “Uh, hello! You can’t say ‘Petronus’, because that is a charm to make things disappear. You would have to say ‘Stupefy’, because that is an actual spell…”

Wow…which is worse: My husband is apparently that big of a nerd or that he thinks I am being serious and that my “spell” will be rendered inefficient because I would be using the wrong terminology?

Turns out I think I have bigger problems now than other people’s road rage.