It’s been a while, and my mind has been overflowing with thoughts recently. Unfortunately for me though, due to a recent lack of sleep, all of my thoughts have escaped me. Instead today I would like to take a moment to reflect on the world presented before me. This is the world that I will have with me for the rest of my life, the world that I will be responsible for maintaining. This is the world that I must keep. In today’s society this idea of maintaining Earth is not thought of as a high priority. People carelessly throw trash from their cars while driving on the interstate, and dump dangerous pollutants into lakes and rivers and the oceans. This lack of maintenance will come back to haunt the human race, simply not the generations that caused it. Pollution caused back when heavy industries first became prominent, in the early years of mining, has only just started to show itself in serious ways.

Global Warming has been around for a few years, though only recently has it become unavoidable. The ice caps are melting at an impressive rate, almost as though they are in a race with the ozone layer to see which will kill us all first. Yes, I know, what a dismal thought, but I speak only the truth. With water rising and solar protection fading the future looks grim for the world and most of the life on it. That’s right, you gotta realize it at some point, what we are doing is also harming other species and not just our own. Are we really that selfish?

You might be questioning the extent in your own involvement of this problem, and yes, some of us are exempt, but the biggest, most powerful people are at the root of the problem. When people like presidents of the country fail to maintain companies, oil companies none the less, it sets a bad example for others. In addition to that, when companies that are prominent in the economy, like these oil companies end up tanking, the economy takes the hit. That means that we all take the hit for someone else’s mistake. Don’t be an innocent by stander, if you see something wrong, speak up. Even if you are the only one.

I would now like to take this time to talk a little bit about the funding for this program, which is provided by the Technolagoridogiria Corp., and the Mafatasismal and Bros. CO. Both of these companies have been working very hard for the past few years at uncovering the truth behind the intelligence of ducks, and I would personally like to acknowledge there major progress. In recent years Mafatasismal and Bros. CO. has managed to catch upwards of 10 ducks, a clear record for any one private business, unfortunately for them though, all of these ducks had been trained in the arts of resistance and did not speak a quack. Because of this, the company has still been unsuccessful in comparing a duck to a person. Technolagoridogiria Corp. however is looking at this problem from a completely different perspective. This company has utilized the advanced abilities of cloning to recreate the duck lord Duckemia of West Duckland Rd, Montcalm, MI. This duck lord is capable of quacking so loud that the Earth stops rotating. Unfortunately when this Corp. had successfully recreated the duck lord, it tore the facility to shreds with its beak. Today I am raising awareness in eleven states and 3.4 territories to promote donating to this Corp. so that they can reconstruct.

Without a doubt you a very confused by now. I you have managed to follow everything just fine, then I suggest getting checked out, but be prepared for next week. I would just like to leave you with a few more words of wisdom before we close this evening. As for the popular chicken who crossed the road, I ask you to reconsider. How do you know that it was not a duck in disguise? This is far more probable because ducks are known widely for their imitations of chickens and monkeys and presidents nationally. I am almost certain that it was in fact a duck that did the crossing, and as for why? Well, we humans may never understand because ducks are in fact, so much smarter than us. The ultimate goal of the duck populace must be respected because we cannot honestly make even an educated guess as to what these ducks are attempting to accomplish. What we can tell you though, is that it will be big, and there will be probably around eight of them.