Sunday morning, I’m making my usual drive back from my week-end job after working ten hours, catching a nap, and heading for home.  It is early, and I note that I need gas for the truck.

I pull over into a little mom-and-pop store, fill up the gas tank, and figure that I can get breakfast here instead of making a stop at McDonalds.  I walk in, note that the store boasts a coffee machine, some canned goods, and broad variety of indigestible comestibles–chips, cookies, etc.

I decide to invest in a cup of raspberry flavored cappacino and a muffin as being the most edible of the lot.  I took a big slurp of the cappacino, and opened the muffin as I was getting into the truck.  The muffin was ok, the drink was ghastly sweet and very heavy on the whitener.  I had not traveled down the road ten miles, when I was aware the drink was a big mistake.  My stomach was sending me clear signals that Real Dairy was involved.

I’m not sure how this works for other folks, but from the signals my stomach sends me, I have a mental image of the dairy product fermenting in there–much like a nice batch of cottage cheese.  It feels like it is breaking up into harsh little chunks interspersed with acid.

Since home was a good long ways away still, I switched back to tea (fortunately I had some left from supper the night before), and nibbled at the muffin in an effort to sop up the painful acids.

By the time I reached home, my stomach definitely did not like me.  After a few uncomfortable bathroom moments, I spent the afternoon sleeping; got up long enough to go do laundry and get a very non-dairy supper, went to bed early and slept nearly 15 hours.

Morning brings stiffness, but otherwise a happier body.

How does one get around lactose intolerance?  There are a variety of solutions.  Some folks use a chemical that helps break down the lactose, some purchase the milk that has been treated.  I am fortunate that I can eat milk  products that are pre-fermented, such as cottage cheese and yogurt.  As far as drinking milk-like products, I have found that soy is tolerable (but produces gas), rice milk is lighter in flavor and doesn’t have unfortunate flatulence effects but also doesn’t boost the protein intake the way soy does, almond milk is interesting but rather sweet.

To carry out the beverage inventory:  soda is bubbly and tastes good, but contains either sugar or artificial sweeteners.  Tea is usually good, but taken too often can irritate the urinary system and create that most embarrassing of senior moments–the sneeze that dampens the knickers as well as the hanky.  Juice is too often laced with additives that include ascorbic acid (yes, I know it occurs naturally in orange juice–but it is use to add tartness and preserve flavor and color in other juices) which will give me a lovely rash after a time.  Coffee is acid and harsh on the stomach…Well, at least water is still available.  Thank goodness for filter pitchers–because my tummy doesn’t much like chlorine either!

Isn’t having a sensitive tummy fun?