Saturday, January 26, 2008

As I start writing this posting, it is about 8:36 PM on a Saturday night. I have weathered a very hard time coping with my acute mental illness and I am trying to get a career together in freelance writing using Triond’s blogs and websites. I have found that over the years, getting my thoughts out in writing has helped me cope with my mental illness and it has hopefully been of some use to our government and both Jews and the non-Jewish community, especially the Christians who fund the State of Israel.

I am finding what I want spiritually in the Hands of the Man from Galilee. It may not sit right with the average person identified with the Jewish establishment but to me, I think I am where I am supposed to be right now.

Life hasn’t been easy for me, as any readers of my postings at http://forum.rickross.com may know right now (my handle there is “richardmgreen”). I am approaching my 49th birthday this Thursday and the fact that I am alive and indoors is despite myself and my leanings towards various religious groups and factions that have been vying for my affiliation.

In “95, I went to Israel during a failed attempt to become an oleh chadash (“new immigrant”) making Aliyah and seeking to live as a Jew among Jews. It didn”t work out that way and my mental problems, which were deep even before I was actually diagnosed as being too sick to work, were exacerbated.

I was living with the Chasidim of Rabbi Shlomo Carlebach, HaRebbe Hashir or “The Singing Rabbi” (he was recently deceased as of October 20th of “94) and they gave me a difficult time, especially Rabbi Witt”s eldest son Yachad who tried to turn me into a golem (a Frankenstein monster used to fight anti-Semites). The Witt’s next-door neighbor attacked me and I wound up going on a tour of the city of Jerusalem in my bid to stay alive and in doors.

After leaving the Witt’s I went to the some youth hostels, Aish Hatorah – they prevented me from starving one day, Diaspora Yeshiva, and finally the Christ Church in the Old City and they gave me some help but not until they forcibly converted me to Christianity which is actually against the law in Israel. Jesus keeps reaching down to me through the ages to further his ministry. And that religion is dying right now.