Ask a friend their biggest regret, and soon you find yourself looking into the eyes of a sinner.

Ask me my biggest regret, and laugh. What I am most regretful of is a silly thing, so utterly stupid, but in truth, I sometimes wish I never did it. There are so many other “criminally wrong” things I’ve committed, stuff that matter more, but this regret I remember. I can tell you it off the top of my head. Most likely, it’ll stay with me for the rest of my life.

I regret buying my bed based on the unicorn mattress that accompanied it.

Now, let me go into detail. I bought this bed when I was, what… five? Six? So long ago, and yet still so vivid in my head. I did not take the wheels in account, the lack of headboard or footboard, or the fact that I would eventually outgrow horses with erect penises on their head. What can I say? I was a little girl, still totally in love with pink and Barbie and Britney Spears. A unicorn bed, oh my! It would top everything off!

Unfortunately, I still am in possession of this bed. I hide the unicorns well with my pretty bed linens and sheets, and I only have to face these horses every two weeks, when I change them. I am tempted to ask my parents for a new bed, but come on! It’s just a bed, when it comes down to the thick of it. I know I shouldn’t still be fretting over such an idiotic thing, but really, it is worth a good musing over.

My brother is about to go off to college, and he has what my mom calls “a captain’s bed.” It’s a bed with drawers and yes! No unicorns! I have probably seen my brother’s mattress in the past, and though I can’t recall its appearance, I don’t remember anything unusual about it. As far as I’m aware, it’s a perfectly normal mattress, no doubt suitable for my now grown-up needs.

As I am writing this, my dreadful bed is right behind me. I look at it now, and realize, despite all its problems, I do love it. It is pretty comfortable, and I’ve had it for nearly ten years now. It grew up with me. Can I really hate a bed that’s been with me through it all? I am growing up, and I recognize now, growing up means letting go of the past. It means moving on to more important things; which then implies I ought to have more important regrets. Truly, purchasing a bed based on its mattress is odd, but it’s not really a regret. It’s living in the moment, being who you were at the time, and looking back at it (with fondness or distaste). It’s your memento of the past. Cherish it, don’t hate it.

And so my biggest regret may be the best decision I have ever made.