To me September has always been a special month because it was the month I was born. This September holds a special milestone for me because I’m about to become half a century old! Ya, I turn 50 on the 4Th of September  and with it I find myself reflecting on many things.

The first thing that comes to mind is 911. This is the 10 year anniversary of that horrible tragedy. I will never forget that day and where I was. How I felt as I watched those towers fall and from the ashes like a Phoenix came the hero’s. Terrorism changed us all that day, I will forever remember the people lost, their families and that Americans came together in unity. That day changed us all, for me it made me a more compassionate person, and I hold the people I love much closer since that fateful day, because we never know what or who is around the next corner. I love yous are spoken much more openly and hugs given even to strangers for their unselfish acts of fighting for our freedom. I am proud to be an American!

I also look back to when my mother was still here and the good times we spent together throughout my childhood and my adult life. Caring for her in her last years of life with only one regret, if I only had one more day to spend with her! I miss her each and every day although tolerable the emptiness I feel will never be filled without her.  I find myself thinking about the day we will unite in heaven when its my turn to pass over. What a day that will be seeing her smiling face to welcome me home.

My father who is now in his 90’s and how his world is becoming so foreign with its new found electronic age. The act of him caring for my ill step mother whom he constantly complains about but seems to love so much. How my childhood was with him and what a mean man he had been to me and all my siblings. If only things had of been different, all those years passed us by and now and feelings can not be healed. What a waste to have 4 children and not hold them dear to you. I love you dad but in a weird sort of way. I will feel bad when God calls you to heaven because we all could have been so close and happy, but it was not to be that way…