I am truly sickened by what I’ve seen.  Just the fact that the harassement that I endure from a public that has been duped, IS ALLOWED?  That alone is grounds for lockup and we haven’t even gotten into the theft of 5 years worth of ideas, or the character assasination that I go through in order for these FAKE PRODIGIES to be held in high esteem. 

I spend all my time trying to clear up all the misunderstandings (at times so great that I am running for my life) rather that actually enjoying any particular moment of my existance.  I have been psychologically traumatized repeatedly and no one ever goes to jail for their actions.  I have been lied about so severely that I have lost an entire quality of life.  I live in hell for no reason. 

The Aspergers alone makes my life less than desirable most of the time.  Rather than anyone adjusting to my needs as an autistic person (ie. a loved one) I am constantly having to “please” a bunch of people that could care less about me or the autism.  They just use me.  That seems to be my only function.  I am constantly racking my brain to adjust to their world.  They should go to the chair and I dont even believe usually in that kind of behavior but lately after twisting myself inside out I am left with no other viewpoint.

Oh lets not forget, every guy that wants to marry me is lied to and redirected toward some girl that they claim is in his better interest.  Then I am left with nothing and no one as usual.

The games are on my last nerve.  I have to deal with them at home as well.  I live with a guy that pretends to talk to me all the while is talking to the “princess” that he is trying to foster with in the community.  She has access to all of me.  The house is bugged so that she hears everything.  Fine with me.  I dont really care, but its funny that the community I live in actually thinks that I think he is talking to me.

I have no personal problem with him but the name of the game in this community is to keep me miserable so that no one will want my “E-Mail” account.  If you dont understand I unfortunately am not able to go into detail about the last comment.  The name of the game is to make the other girl look like a shining star at my expense.

Thats alright though, because now that the other girl has been accepted in this community, I will probably get thrown out on the street, now that she is me that is.

Everyone hates me for no reason and no one even knows that I have Aspergers Syndrome and am autistic which if they knew might help them understand that my action or lack there of are most of the time completely random.

I hate my life.