Well, I made it through my first year of college without a scratch…physically. In fact from a physical standpoint im in better shape than I’ve ever been, pretty healthy compared to my snicker & gummy bear days (man do I miss those snickers).

     Eating whey and pissing creatine was my motto, waking up at 5 am trekking straight for the REC. While 98 & ¾’s of the campus is tucked tightly in their thermal sheets, sharing dreams of yesterdays parties and nightmares of tomorrows exams my guy, Quinton (Q-Styles M. Shelton if you love him) & me are lifting weights & running miles before they can bash a weary eyelash. That’s just the morning before anyone ever wakes up, not even a portion of my day and I’m already working hard, just the price of glory I figured.

     However mentally, mentally I’m prostrated, dead on my feet if you will. They say hell hath no fury like a woman scorn, but I can guarantee if that woman was a freshman Chemistry major, that bitch would be so fatigued she would just have to get over it because the date of those three test in Biology, Chemistry, & Calculus would be so close on her ass her Victoria Secret (or Hanes, depending on the day of the week or time of the month it is) would be the only thing b/w her & a Flag (an F for my uninformed readers). I think the quote should read a suicide victim hath seen no stress like a first year college student, yea that sound about right; papers, speeches, labs, lectures, seminars, note taking, readings, test, quizzes, studying, experiments, dissections, & then homework both online and tangible on top of that.

     I’m not slandering higher education in any form or fashion and I understand completely all these things are necessary for a proper education but that does not take away from the fact that it is absolutely slave work stressful staying on top of a load like that. No, no one said it would be easy but come on online and tangible homework? Einstein would say screw that.

     Besides did I not just spend my entire day from 8am to 8pm in class and from there straight to the library until 12pm, leaving only because it closes at that time(Of course not all college students are hardworking and I’m probably not speaking for all college students here; hell who am I kidding I’m not speaking for many at this point but that’s how my days went).

     I didn’t know the difference between a quiz and a test in high school but I quickly observed in college; a quiz can burn your grade but a test will batter it in failure and sauté it! I did not sign up for this hell; not eating until 3pm because my classes run all day, staying up until 4:30am to finish work and waking up an hour later to finish that same work. The sad part is that’s just the education part, I haven’t even mentioned the social aspect.

     Asher Roth must have forgotten a few bars in his song, “Man I Love College” my ass! Sure if I was partying, drinking, skipping class, rich, of a higher social class, and promiscuous every night I would love college too. Where’s recess, midday naps on mats, QUIET TIME, and what in the Sam Hill happened to projects?! At this rate hopefully we can find each other’s Sugar Mamma’s before I die of stress Professor Lawrence, but I still got dibs on Beyoncé …