About last night – a friend and I were at dinner, seated next to an attractive young man. He was courteous, yes, but a little miserly with the smiles. I was intrigued.  A full hour of ignoring us, he suddenly did an about face. He started smiling, making conversation, and was very solicitous of our needs.  The change was very sudden, my friend and I thought he was, well, bi-polar. We later learned that it was upon knowing who my friend was, and the discovery of her pedigree that caused the change.

Strange that in this age of enlightenment and political correctness, people like them abound. First they ignore and pretend you don’t exist.  After filtering essential information on your “pedigree”, they come to a decision that you’re “somebody” and metamorphose from aloof to solicitous and go straight for the kill.  It’s called Standard Operating Procedure.  

How can you quantify a person’s worth based on his family name and wealth? I know of people who act positively towards someone they perceive to be powerful/ moneyed because it will be beneficial to their status or their career.  They fall all over themselves trying to be solicitous, to be liked, to become part of the “in” crowd.  For some, climbing the social ladder and keeping up with Joneses is a social activity, but is there a point to it, really?  Remember the caterpillar pillar in the book, “Hope for the Flowers”?  Caterpillars were climbing all over each other to get to the top, only to discover that there was nothing there. All that hopping and climbing up that social ladder is for naught, not to mention tiresome.  

On the other side of the spectrum are people who demand special treatment, exactly because of their name, wealth and power.  That’s a whole lot worse.  In a typical social milieu, there are people who scamper to please their local politicians, and sometimes belittle themselves in his service. Although they are naturally respectful of people they perceived to be important, politicians should appreciate the gesture, but never encourage, nor more importantly, abuse it.    

Lest we all turn cynics, we do meet people who couldn’t care less where anyone comes from. To them, it doesn’t matter what your name is, who your parents are or what kind of car you drive. They don’t treat you any differently from the next person.  Everyone is the same and on equal footing: worthy of interest, attention and respect.

In the end, it all boils down to how we think of ourselves.  If we measure another’s worth based on his name and bank account, it only mirrors how we measure our worth. Is a name and bank account all you are?   

I read some somewhere that power is knowing that one’s name, title and material possession  has very little to do with who you are.  Who you are is actually the quality of the heart that beats inside you.  Remember Mother Teresa? Not much wealth there, but her great love for the poor determined her influence and strength as a person.  If we truly want to improve our worth, we need not keep up with the Joneses, nor climb social ladders.  All we need is to look into the quality of our hearts, and we would be exactly where we need to be.