I can’t call my neighbors impoverished or poor. They have all the amenities that modern technology can offer except for air conditioning units. They have tricycles with which they ply their trade of buying and selling junk. The women can afford to gamble with playing cards from morning to afternoon. Some men drink liquor the whole day. Yet, they defecate or pee anywhere they please.  They just cover their stool with  soil or put  it in plastic  and throw it in the open or the river nearby. Perhaps sanitation is not on their list of priorities.

I left my neighbors and headed for the river. I passed by a group of children playing on a vacant lot where guava trees and banana stalks used to stand. Three decades ago, we chased around and played with dragonflies on this place at May’s first rainfall. Tall and thick grass adorned the land and it was fun to roll over and lie on the ground as your body is being peppered with raindrops. Where have the dragonflies gone? Not a single one of them buzzed around this morning. How I missed the brilliant colors they proudly displayed whenever they flew aplenty. The once colorful panorama of my youth is now a dull barren piece of land and the empty sight all the more added to the gloominess that’s overwhelming my whole being.

I walked on until I reached a tamarind tree standing near the edge of the river. The tree used to light up like a giant Christmas tree every night when I was a child. Fireflies swarmed all over it and twinkled like little stars that fell from the sky. Alas, not a single firefly flaunted its cool gentle light at this landmark for over a decade. The nightly spectacle of the old days has ceased to give this part of the river its radiant glory.

I looked down on the body of water before me. I thought a community of giants lived nearby and spilled their chocolate drink on the river basin. It was dark and pieces of garbage floated about including human feces! What used to be a pool of crystal clear water in my youth is now a virtual septic tank.

I reached for my cigarette and lighter in my pocket but I pulled out a pen instead. My mind is pregnant with a lot of thoughts and my heart is bulging with emotions. Perhaps my pen could pry them open so they would not explode and send me into madness and depression. I walked home rolling the pen between my fingers. I am going to write during this vacancy in my life…