Dearest Greg,

Nice of you to write to me. How did you manage to find the paper? Someone gave it to you for free? Greg my sweetheart, I knew you were a leech, why did you think I was crying? It’s because I couldn’t wait for you to leave.

 I’m so happy you found someone who will support you, treat her very well, women of her kind are very few. By the way, Simon says hello. Yes, your friend Simon from way back, right now he’s laying in my lap.

Goodbye for now looser….Simon is waiting.