Dear Alayna,

       I have found myself in a bit of a predicament. My cousin Tammi divorced her husband Don a little over two years ago. They have a little boy together that Don has custody of. The reason my cousin left her husband was to pursue a new life as a lesbian. Don was devastated because he loved Tammi with all of his heart. He really didn’t see it coming. I have been helping Don out by watching his son while he worked. I started doing it about six months after the divorce. I love that little boy just like he was my own.

     I am also divorced with two little girls of my own. I work from home so that I can always be here when my girls need me. That is why I decided to help Don with his daycare dilemma. After a year and a half of watching this little boy, teaching him, careing for  him like my own child, and now recently making dinner for both Don and his son, I think I am falling in love with Don. I am not sure how it happened but it’s there. I don’t know what to do. I don’t want to tell Don how I feel because I am afraid that he will feel uncomfortable around me and not come around. Or worse, he might not let me watch his son anymore. I don’t think I can handle that and I know my daughters will miss him. It’s weird feeling this way about a man that was married to my cousin. But we have also been friends for years. Please help!!!

Lost in Montana

Dear Lost in Montana,

     I can see your dilemma, however, I don’t understand where you think you have a problem.  The only issue I can see is the fact that you are afraid of rejection. I understand that he was married to your cousin, but if she chose to go another way, then he is a free man. If Don is having dinner at your house with his son, has he ever shown you any signs that he might feel the same way? You might want to talk to him and find out if he is even ready for another relationship, especially if he took his divorce as hard as you say he did. Maybe you could let him know how much you love his son and you wouldn’t want anything to come in the way of your relationship with his little boy. If he is as good a man as you seem to think he is, I am not sure sharing your feelings with him is going to scare him off. It might even make the two of you closer.