My mom passed away 26 years ago. I wrote this with the hopes that she will get it in heaven.

Dear Mom, I know that I can’t put a stamp on this and send it to you through the mail. I thought I would write and hope that God will pass this on to you. I want you to know that I have recieved the messages that you have sent since you went to heaven. Some days I may be to busy with life not to notice that you have stopped by to visit. I know that even though you are not here in physical form, you do stop by now & then through your spirit. I loved the hearts you sent in the snow a few weeks ago. That was really special.

I’m sorry that I wasted so many years with being angry at you. When you passed away I was only 23. I have matured so much since then. I am no longer angry and I hope that you will forgive me for the way I treated you when you were alive. Now that I am older I can look back and know that I was too young to appreciate you and all that you had done for me. I still have the letter that you started to write to me before you passed away. Even though you didn’t get the chance to finish it I hold on to it and cherish it.

I wish that you could have lived long enough to meet your Grandchildren. I’ve had four boys! I know that you are taking care of Jason in heaven. It gives me so much comfort knowing that he is with you. What’s it like in heaven? Is Jason still a baby or has he grown over the years? Daniel was born less than two years after you passed. I know that you would be so proud of him. He’s very independent and quite handsome. He’s so much like me in both looks and personality. Tyler is still my baby even though he’s twenty now. Remember how you always called me your baby? That use to really irritate me. Now, I understand why you always called me your baby even though I was grown. Tyler turned out to be a combination of both me and his Dad. He is still a baby and struggling to grow up. He’s in college and doing quite well with that. I went on to have a fourth son, Zack. He’s going to be 15 this May. I placed him for adoption. I really wish that you would have been around when I was going through that. I know that you would have given me advice and helped me through the mental and physical turmoil during that phase of my life. I think that’s about the time in my life when I really started to realize how much I missed you and needed you. Zack is with with a good family and I think I made the right choice.

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  • nutuba on Jan 14, 2009

    Wow, this is powerful, sad, but with a tinge of hope, all at once. Nicely done.

  • mary on Jan 15, 2009

    wow, this was touching to me. You have such a way with words. A beautiful tribute to your Mom. xox

  • Carchapp on Jan 15, 2009

    A wonderful heartfelt letter. My Mum died 32 years ago when I was 16. I have written many letters,non of which i have felt compelled to share – very brave of you

  • Debbie Bicknell on Jan 15, 2009

    I love this and have to admit that I am balling my eyes out. Like a big ole baby! I love how compassionate and open you are about your feelings. The more I get to know you I realize more and more how much we are alike and it makes me sad that our family is so far apart and we weren’t as close as we could have been! I have often wandered why when I ask mom about grandma she never says anything and never understood why she doesn’t speak of her. My mom and I have been to hell and back together but I often miss her prematurely as well and know when that time comes I will continue to keep her alive in memory. I love you Aunt Mary and cherish that we become closer!!!!

  • Lady Syxess on Jan 16, 2009

    I’ve been trying to find the right words 2 sum up this wonderful piece, but you know what? It speaks for itself. Well done, your honesty and humbleness comes through in all your articles and for that alone I hope you will be rewarded. Blessings
    Lady 6X

  • Mary Jo on Mar 29, 2009

    My Dad passed away Friday March 27, 2009. We were in Florida on a family trip. He suddenly became very ill & had to have emergency surgery; he didn\’t make it. I love you & I miss you Dad.

  • andrea on Jan 11, 2010

    i completely just broke down .. i’m 23 years old,24 in may and just lost my mother 2 months ago of sudden death,pulminary embolism .. i was there when she collapsed and held her while she was dieing. i feel the exact same way in every way you put everything. even about growing up and being mean and angry while she was alive,and my father,too is lonely and stays in his room all the time,i think about him dieing because he is sick and i realized after reading that,that i do mourn him already.

    i just sent this to my two sisters through my email

    thank you so much,even though it made me cry so hard,it made me feel better in a way,its all the things i want to say and the things i think of but can never get the words out .. ( my mothers sisters name is donna btw ) and my sister,sarah,was 7 months pregnant when my mother passed away we wish she would’ve gotten to meet her new grandchild.

    idk im just completely touch by this.

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