I apologize for my virtual absence recently, so I am at my computer once again in an attempt to brighten your day and give you your F Clemons fix. So hello once again to my loyal readers or anyone who may have just discovered my on-line opinion.

Have you ever found yourself talking amongst your piers or colleagues telling a story about your life when someone else quickly replies with a slightly better version of your story? For example; if you just ate a lot, they ate more. if you only got 1 hour of sleep, they only got half an hour. if your grandma just died, their grandma was a terrorist who just died taking 18 others with her. You just can never beat them.

I recently discovered one of these story-topping bastards in my life. He’s essentially a mini orange-headed Sasquatch that is always just a little bit better and worse than me at the same time. Now if you’re reading this and you have a story-topper in your life, you’re probably wondering what to do to resolve the problem. Remember that violence isn’t the answer, simply story top them. If someone has a head ache and the story-topper mentions that he has a worse migraine, you just chime in to reveal that you were just tested positive for AIDS. 

Also, listen to the stories that they tell. Often times, details grow with the story when told numerous times. So pay close attention to the things that they say, so that when repeated you can call them on the changes they have made and watch their story-topping lies crush them.

I hope that the passage that I have just written helps you overcome some story-topping obstacles in your life. So please check out my other blogs, and better your life folks. And let these words be a lesson unto you, reminding you that if you suck at life, someone sucks better than you!

Sincerely,

Forrest ClemonsAnd