From: tim broughton 
Sent: 29 April 2009 12:14
To: Sir George Young MP
Subject: The Abbreviation of Hampshire

Dear Sir George

Just thought I’d get in touch about a small matter relating to the name of your county, Hampshire. I’m sure you’re very busy in your constituency, being Hampshire’s third highest profile MP, so I’ll keep this brief.

Many English counties have shortened abbreviations such as Yorkshire to Yorks or Berkshire to Berks. Cambridgeshire diminishes to Cambs and Derbyshire to Derbs. Now, I’m sure you’ve noticed from these examples that there is a pattern forming. I made up this little rhyming rule and taught it to my six children, lest they forget and have to write the whole county name out. It goes like this:

‘Grab the first syllable and the S from Shire,

whack ‘em together and we’ll never tire!’ (because we save energy writing abbreviated county names)

Now perhaps you’ve guessed where I’m heading with this. Of all the counties that use this system, HAMPSHIRE BREAKS THE RULE! Instead of being Hamps and conforming to my witty, elegant rhyme, you write Hants!!! You romance the P in your full name, whispering sweet sonnets with liquorice tongue, and the whole time you’re nipping 4 doors down Alphabet Road for a quickie with Frauline T!

The game’s up Sir George!

But seriously, if you could spare the time to offer a short explanation around the spelling of Hants, that would be much appreciated. It has been nagging at me for a number of years, causing dark, skulking panther-like headaches. By further way of incentive, let me assure you that I’ve managed to narrow down my voting options for the next election to three parties, and yours is one of them, if you know what I mean.

Happy legislating

Tim

P.S Your website could do with a thorough overhaul.

From: Sir George Young MP
Sent: 29 April 2009 12:47
To: tim broughton
Subject: The Abbreviation of Hampshire

Dear Tim

Thank you for the email; I am only sorry I do not know the answer to your question.

Best wishes,
George Young

From: tim broughton
Sent: 29 April 2009 13:133
To: Sir George Young MP 
Subject: The Abbreviation of Hampshire

Dear Sir George,

Whilst I appreciate your swift response, do feel free to take your time to properly investigate this query. Make a few phone calls, maybe pop down County Hall and rifle through some records etc. Remember, my six little ones will be of voting age soon, and with myself and my wife, that’s 8 votes – Hello fourth term!

Yours fondly

Tim

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From: Sarah McCarthey-Fry MP