Dear Matt,

I didn’t mean to bother you, I just wanted to say hello and “I’m sorry,” one last time.  I wish I could say it was a comfort to have had some sort of contact with you just once more.  When we last spoke, you said we could be friends but it was up to me to do all the work.  That could go on for only so long before I felt like I was bothering you.  Though you never actually told me, I guess I must have been bothering you.  And with this most recent interaction, I realize that you hate me and think that I wish harm on you.  I have no ill will for you.  I hope life goes well for you, I’m happy that you’ve moved on, and I’m trying to do the same.  Though I can’t tell you personally, since you’ve decided we’re done trying to be friendly, I wanted to tell you that I’m done carrying this overwhelming guilt.  I made a mistake, and I can’t fix it.  I’m sorry I hurt you, and I’ve told you that a million times.  It’s been three years and I’m still carrying this, the scars are only slightly faded.  I’m sorry to have done something that cost me a close friend.  I don’t have many, so it’s particularly painful to have to cut one loose.

With my call, I was just trying to find some sort of peace, and I know you don’t care.  But it’ll be okay.  I won’t contact you, just like you asked.  And I’ll disappear.  If you should ever get the urge, not that it will ever happen, but if you do, I won’t be there.  I’ll let myself out.

Goodbye,

Gina