During all this 2 hours I’ve been sitting here and trying to write something that is going to catch people’s attention and then they’ll just make make a nice comment about my work that’ll make me feel way better about the things that I didn’t write but wished I actually have had, but the truth is that i’m just tired of trying and pretending. Everyday seems like a drag instead of beeing fun and unexpected and just adventorous in general, but it’s none of this things, instead it all just seems planned and all just so scheduled. And i don’t understand anything because my parents apparently give so much freddom and responsabilities like they really trust me, but then again they don’t because I’m not allowed to even go out with my friends or even go out by myself in that matter. Sometimes i even ask myself some teenagy, crybaby questions like if i’m cut out for this life,and the worst part is that i’ve thought about just giving an end to my life. But what i really hate about myself is that i care so much about what people think of me, even when i repeatedly tell myself that i don’t, when truly i’m just lying to myself like some drug addict, not wanting to admit they have a problem. It all just seems so complicated, and it really shouldn’t be this way because i’m young and i should be able to do all sorts of things and just have a great time, and just not care about other people, or bills and grades because it just makes my life so much  more complicated. But i guess i’m not the kind of person i wish i were, or maybe i don’t know who i am. That just sounds so lame and stupid that you’ll probably just think that i’m some whining teenager going through some weird phase, but really, i’m just tired of having conversations inside my head that i just want somebody and everybody to know what i truly feel and think, even when everything is just stupid and lame like all the things i’ve written so far…