This is the first "book" I wrote way back when I was fourteen years old. I am thinking about rewriting it and could use some suggestions and overall feedback on the plot and story in general. Thank you for your help!
Another week in the hospital and Shannon was ready to go home. The nurse squeezed her tightly before she left wishing Shannon good luck. Her ribs still ached and she had bruises everywhere up her arms but she was ready to leave. Emotionally she would have liked to stay in the hospital. She had never felt safer in the past month and two weeks.
Since the crash had been fatal to Shannon’s truck she was left without an automobile for the time being. The car that had crashed into it had been driving so fast it demolished Shannon’s engine. There was still some glass shards left on the driveway from the shattered windshield. Two deep tire trenches were let in the front lawn. Shannon sighed, when was she ever allowed to have anything decent?
Starlynn had been staying at Shannon’s house to look after Crissy. Shannon enjoyed the company and did not want her sister to leave. “Hey Star?” She called her sister for short, “I want to ask you something.”
“Ok. Spill.” She answered through a mouth full of bobby pins.
“Do you really have to go?”
“Well.” She stopped to pull out one of the pins, “I don’t have anywhere else to go except to live with our moms.”
“Why don’t you live here then?”
“I don’t want to be a burden.”
“You are my sister! Besides the house is a lot homier with family in it. Rather than there just being a spoiled dog and a loner!”
“I guess our family is kind of jacked up in the first place.” Starlynn laughed, “For one thing there is no men!”
“Here. Here.” Shannon hooted.
They laughed. Even though it was a tragedy that had brought them together it somehow had brought them closer than they would have ever been. Their broken family has become healed by a loss, even if there is still some dry blood and a jagged scar on the family name.
The sisters organized for Starlynn’s move to be that weekend. Their mother’s advised against it until the killer was caught but their worry was ignored. Newspaper articles dubbed the killer the “Selven Slayer.” Starlynn noted that “slayer” was a bit corny but then again there was nothing else to call it besides a mystery.
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