Well there I was,  being not very bright in the mind as usual. I decided to harvest seaweed because of it’s endless health benefits and product usage. The usual idiocy that I employ I was guilty of once again. I had done no research, had now idea how to process the seaweed and my lantern burned out. I was by a coral reef in shark infested water.

I am Bo Jack, I have no reason to fear anything, again only because I’m pretty much an idiot. Well I took a bunch of seaweed and dragged it up into my little boat, making it overloaded on one end. Well my doctor said get exercise so I thought this would be good. I climbed in the boat but it was taking on water. all I had was a survival kit with band-aids and a candle with no way to light it.

As the boat continued to sink I realized I was not only up the creek but in the ocean armed with only an unlit candle and seaweed tangled around my shoulders. Well luck would have it that Jaws just happened to be swimming in the area that day and he was hungry. The Shark could choose the menu of seaweed, candle wax or Bo Jack beef… Now hold on it’s not over yet.

Image via Wikipedia

A tropical storm came out of nowhere and lightning struck the shark killing it. That was a good thing for me. At that moment I saw Duff, Gringo and Brad in another boat about 20 meters away. I was relieved, if only for a second. Well Jaws brother happened to swim along too, and he was also hungry. Again he had options, seaweed, a stupid useless candle or me.

Image via Wikipedia

Well as it cam to pass, Duff said, “Sorry bloke but I’m not getting in that water!” Then Bradley said, “Well Bo you see, this is the very reason I live in Arizona, no oceans or sharks; I wish I could help but all I have are these sunglasses and this tan and Brumbles; and he doesn’t swim and he’s only a stuffed animal so that won’t deter Jaw’s brother.” Gringo boldly said, “Cheers Bo, I’ll give ‘er a go, those guys are pussies!”

So Gringo jumped in the water, attracting Jaw’s brother. The shark swam over and bit a hunk out of Gringo, then swam back and bit me in half.

A little leprechaun swam out of Gringo’s stomach and back over to the boat narrowly escaping the jaws of death and said he’d regenerate later, I died, the end. Bo Jack sucks, but there still is no substitute.

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More coming soon. Candles and seaweed, there is no substitute.