The Constant Chatter Continues Three

   Okay okay, so I said I wasn’t a cry baby, but man I’ve hardly stopped at all this week and I can’t get any sleep either. I feel like someone  has gotten into my gums and are boring holes in them! Talk about pain- I can tell you whoever said, there’s no sensation in matter, could never have experienced this! Mommy says I’m teething, but I swear I’m not doing a thing, honest I’m not. It’s all been done TO me. I wonder if I’ve got an evil spirit in my head and he’s is digging his way out through? I don’t know why mommy won’t take me to the doctor – maybe she thinks I’ll catch the swine flu from all those people in the waiting room. What about the minister that threw the water over me? He should be able to cast out evil spirits, that’s part of his job isn’t it? Don’t look so surprised – just because I haven’t been here very long doesn’t mean I haven’t read the Bible!  Mommy says that Grandma has a teething ring for me and she’s bringing it over after lunch but I don’t know what good a ring is going to do?  Mommy’s got two rings in her ears and three on her fingers, and when she takes them off she always says “don’t let Max put that in his mouth”.  I have a feeling that there should be someone that I could ask about all of this…but I can’t seem to remember now. I guess it  must have been a dream.

I’m beginning to think that this may be an interesting place to live after all, now that I’m getting a chance to look it over. You see mommy took me to a birthday party last week and there were lots of other kids there, some good lookin’ chicks too. I’ve already chosen my girlfriend, I think she’s about my age – and man is she hot!  I swear I almost peed my pamper when she smiled at me. I can’t wait to play post office! I’m finally getting this walking business  down too, I took three steps today before I fell and mommy gave me a big hug – it’s sooo good to know that you’re loved and wanted- I hope all the little boys and girls in the world are loved just as much as me. Mommy says that daddy will be home after just three more sleeps, and I can’t wait – I know my daddy loves me – and he loves my mommy too. That’s what makes a happy family – even I’m smart enough to know that.  Oh! Grandma is here and that means I get my teething  ring. Now isn’t that funny! I’ve been so busy chattering that I forgot all about the pain in my gums – I’m coming grandma – I’m coming.