Chapter Two

My eyes snapped open. Had I said her name aloud? I quickly looked at the body next to me, still sleeping. Gingerly I got out of bed careful not to wake him.

Sweat had plastered my clothes to my body chilling me. My insides were twisting making me gag. I wondered how long these nightmares were going to last. Kit had died a week ago, dead and buried. Why did I keep coming back to earlier that day? What had gone wrong?

I sat on the floor as soon as I reached the bathroom. A few minutes would pass before the nausea subsided long enough for me to bathe. Whimpers passed my trembling lips but I would not cry. For all the beatings I had taken in my life the emotional blow of what had happened merely seven days ago would leave a permanent mark. Cuts and bruises would heal; memories would remain forever branded into my mind never to fade.

Hands shaking I somehow found the strength to stand. The sight of my reflection nearly brought me right back down again. Though the bruises were beginning to heal they still sat purple and swollen across the left side of my face. My lip was puffy and stitches marked where my piercing had been ripped out. A blood vessel had burst in my eye. I looked terrible but I was alive.

I turned away from the mirror and began the struggle of undressing. Broken ribs, a sprained back, bruised wrists, legs and arms made this task nearly impossible. Those were just a few of the injuries I had sustained on the endless list of damage. Each pain caused a gasp, which in turn caused pain to my ribs, which clenched my jaw and so on. Any normal person would give up and admit defeat. I accepted the pain, challenged it even, bring me your worst.

The scalding water brought little comfort as I let it pool around my naked body. I sat in the center of the tub, knees drawn painfully to my chest. My body, a work of art in my eyes had become an ugly reminder of the horror I had endured. Yet, no matter how many stitches and black and blue blotches distorted my image I could not bring myself to cry. Pain curled like bloody smoke inside my heart, packed away in a bottle, my little secret, my burden.