First Causes
What is it in itself
An anger burning deep within the soul
due to a perceived slight.
Self-imposed envy
Manifested into existence
Because others have free access
to what you are denied.
Unknown source of punishment
restricting forward movement
into happiness.
Retaliation
First directed outward
Becomes an inward maelstrom
spiraling into an abyss
of self-loathing.
A slow meticulous analysis
of what’s missing
and possibly why.
Ego fights responsibility.
It’s not me.
A choice of annihilation
An attempt to wipe the slate clean
knowing renewal is impossible.
A hunger to try anyway.
To fix what was never broken.
Yet deep within the agony of despair
You know the maker understands
and eventually will rectify the situation.
The world will never agree.