Every corner I turn,
Every dirt path I trod along,
Leads me straight back
To the manhole I’ve climbed out of
Too many times before.

I find myself endlessly searching
For a night without the moon,
And a day with shining stars,
Absurd as it may sound,
And still I’ve found
Nothing at all.

These days just last too long
Praying for some miracle from God
For the strength and guidance
I cannot extract from myself.
For a way to see my soul,
Instead of just this shell.

The mirror screams at me,
“Don’t look back”
But I always do.
And I always find comfort
In just a face,
Or a conversation without a thought.

A set of lips,
For just a taste;
But never enough to nourish.
User friends that use,
And are used,
That cloud their minds
With fake warmth,
And lukewarm affection.

Though I deny the fact,
I am one of them
Just as scared inside,
But still ready to fight
The next outsider
With a burning eye
Or a raw comment
That makes me see myself.

Never wanted to break free
Until the day I realized I was a prisoner
And still I accept
These shackles and chains
Like a perverted adulturer
With a bondage fetish.

Let me be liberated,
Let me liberate myself.
I’m going to pick up the pieces,
And this time I won’t quit
Until each one is in place.