A most unfortunate occurrence befalls this Scotsman!
Ah’ve Ripped Me Breeks!
Oh michty me, oh fit a faff
Ah’ve neigh on ripped me breeks in half!
Ah jist bent doon tae tie me shoe
A tearin’ soond and look’t me noo
Me troosers torn richt roond the crotch
Oh turn yer heid, please, dinna watch
Or else ye’ll see me grubby boxers
Oh heck, ah’m blushin’ tae me oxters!
Now whar’s the nearest safety pin?
Ah need tae get me fixed agin!
Glossary of terms
ah: I
michty me!: mild exclamation of surprise, much used by cartoon stereotype Scotsmen
fit: what
faff: bother, nuisance
breeks: trousers (UK English), pants or slacks (US English)
tae: to
oxters: armpits
whar: where
And the rest you’ll just have to work out for yourselves!
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