Cover via Amazon

I run faster than human can eye decipher.

My feet remain in the air almost flying while the land remains untouched.

There is little light penetrating this dark night, yet my eyes pierce through the blackness with pure ease.

The moon hangs low with teaming stars twinkling in a muted glow, yet I cannot see their beauty.

Where am I running to?

This I cannot answer.

I am not running to anything.

I am running away.

Time to stop running.

Time to remember why I am fleeing.

I close my eyes and right on cue, there she is.

Her face haunts my dreamless nights.

Her perfect face is soft and tender.

A rosy glow adorns her cheeks.

Oh to only feel her delicate skin one more time.

To let the warmth of her existence consume my frigid despair.

To once again rest my granite cheek upon her beating heart, knowing it is beating just for me.

To stare into the depths of her chocolate eyes and peer into her beautiful soul.

These thoughts knock the wind out of an already breathless creature.

I crouch over in pure desolate agony, curling into a tight ball rocking back and forth on the glacial concrete.

My eyes shine like black ice.

There is nothing in this world I long to see except for this girl’s face.

Beautiful and loving standing before me in flesh not fantasy.

My fantasy is my own anguish, for I now live in my own hollow world, devoid of my most precious need.

This world of mine holds no joy, no hope for me.

I patiently wait for our play to end.

Romeo and Juliet never seemed so real.

I wander in a pure lonely existence without the girl.

The monster within temps me to return, but I made her a promise.

An internal tug of war splitting me into two; man versus monster.

No matter how much I yearn to be this girl’s man, I can’t be.

The monster will never permit it.

She deserves a life.

I was only threatening that life.

Each beat her heart thumped for me just plummeted her closer to eternal damnation.

A bitter sweet reassurance; as her life continues, that in turn sanctifies the end of mine.

I miss my family, but I am in no condition to return, therefore, I stalk the night alone.

I have not felt the sun since I left the light of my life behind.

Oh, how I long to revisit the meadow, our meadow; just to see if her exquisite scent still lingers behind.

I yearn for that breathtaking scent to crash over me like a tidal wave grasping me with an unwavering fierceness, never to let go.

Oh how that scent once taunted me like my own personal demon, that same scent is still taunting me, only now I ache for it, but do not deserve it.

This desire is to remain my own personal hell.
I can never again feel her delicate touch or bask in her incredible warmth or breathe in her striking scent.

I have hurt her far too much.

I’m sorry.

I’m sorry I had to fall in love with you.

I hope you forgive me someday.

I will never forgive myself for all the pain I have bestowed upon you to endure on my selfish behalf.

I will love you for all eternity, but I understand if you despise me.

I have earned your anger, your hatred; that is truly all this monster merits.

Sadly, this is how it has to be.

There shall never be a happy ending for the bad guy.

You will find your human hero for this monster has already been slain.

I died the day I looked into your loving eyes and uttered those blasphemous words.

I cannot bear to repeat those despicable heinous lies.

I cringe at the thought; this unbearable agony would cripple, maim and obliterate any human.

But, alas, I am not human.

If I were human, I would be with you instead of suffering in my own earth bound hell.

No I am forever a monster.

Therefore, I must keep running, not to you like I so vehemently desire, but away from you.

Away forever my sweet, as if I’d never existed.