An experiment of the use of repetition, audience expectation and structure.

Clear water circled the silver drain. The bottom of the shower was clinically white, kept 

sterile like his body. A fresh white towel waited on the side, cold like his heart. As water 

runs down his face, his eyes wide open – serious, stern. Behind the calm expression lies a 

troubled mind.

 Blood was the most obvious at first. After a few moments the volumes of crimson become 

secondary as the little things become the first. A dirtied hammer, stained with a life that 

he had once loved. A ripped shirt, clawed at by the fingers that had once lovingly caressed 

his back – it helped him sleep at night. 

 Green was not his favourite colour, but it was the colour of his sin. Jealousy had driven 

him to this, a jealousy that had built over years. A man so loving, devoted to the search for 

perfection, human nature was never acceptable. He had loved her and now he had killed her.

 Clear water circled the silver drain. The bottom of the shower was clinically white, kept 

sterile like his body. His eyes wide open – serious, stern. Behind the calm expression lies 

a troubled mind. 

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Comments (2)
  • coffeeadict on Dec 5, 2011

    Could be a great starting point for a thriller.

  • camalonious on Dec 5, 2011

    Thank you :)

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