Bluntly.

I have never felt so…

undesired before.

I have never felt so

unrightly naked.

Honestly.

I feel wounded

again

by your insensitivity

and really

am I that unattractive?

I know you do not mean it.

I mean, I know you do not mean

to upset me the way you do

but I am upset.

Quite simply, I am upset.

How else can I explain it?

That I do things,

and I plan things

and I offer things

and I am left here with rejection.

Yes, quite bluntly, rejection.

And it makes me feel like what I need

or even what I have to give

just does not matter.

But honestly

I am tired of thinking it doesn’t matter.

Your insensitivity has awoken my addictions.

And quite simply, I am upset.

Very, very upset.

October 31, 2009