Crystal ball,

Tell me my fortune.

Will I be a success?

Will I be wealthy?

Will I be blessed?

Crystal ball,

Reveal my future to me.

Will I be married?

Will I find the job of my dreams?

Will I get involved in unsavory schemes?

Crystal ball,

Your silence is making me upset.

Will I make a fortune

Or will I be in debt?

Crystal ball,

You have revealed nothing to me.

You have failed to tell me what will be.

I have no further use for you.

I’m casting you out to sea.

Perhaps you can give advice to the Little Mermaid.

Just make sure the advice is free.