Dad was digging in the garden

When he struck a custard well

Mum was none too happy

By her phizog you could tell

We watched the plume of custard

As it rose up to the sky

Dad declared “It’s bloomin’ lovely

We can have that with some pie

Mum was still unhappy

“This has ruined my best dress

You can both get out there later

And clear up this ruddy mess”

First thing in the morning

I went out, to see the hole

Scraped away the surface

And I filled a little bowl

Sitting on my haunches

In my jim jams and a vest

I took a cautious spoonful

And declared it was the best

Then later on, the press appeared

And in the garden mustered

As Dad explained how he had found

A lake of perfect custard

A well known geolologist

Was hired to survey

He said our well, might just achieve

Ten thousand puds a day

So, Dad went out and bought himself

A brand new custard pump

And put it in the shed that he

Was just about to dump

With lots and lots of effort

And a little bit of planning

We built ourselves a factory

And we started custard canning

Now mum is very happy, ‘cause

We’ve bought a house that’s bigger

Don’t know what she’ll say though

When she sees Dad’s bought a digger