His words are
enchanting but thoughts are chaotic
it makes you believe that he might be psychotic.
Tossing and turning not knowing what’s wrong
the night becomes boring restless and long.
He thinks about
torturing the weak that are oh so defenseless
and making love to the dead without feeling relentless.
The smallest sight of blood brings a smile to his face
and the world around him moves at such a slow pace.
His worst fear
now realized, he’s alone because he was left for dead
his wounds no longer bleed but they’re still full of lead.
In no hurry he gets up and walks around the river
and thinks about all the times “it” ate away at his liver.
He leans over
the rail and lets himself fall over
on the way down, thinking how he did this sober.
The speed increases and he crashes to the bottom
no one notices on this beautiful day in autumn.
His body feels
numb but he tries to move around anyway
and no one knew they passed by his lifeless body everyday.
Now he believes that God is making him play a twisted game
because he’s trying to leave this earth but’s it’s always the same.
He stops rustling
and his eyes turn red as he begins to cry
about how demented he was for wanting to die.
Suddenly his chest feels heavy and he finds it hard to take a breath
he didn’t know that his sorrow would eventually lead to his death.
His heart is
no longer beating and his eyes are open wide
staring towards the sky, he’s finally gone, and still no one’s by his side.
The desperate attemps to end his life were nothing more than a waste
but he got what, at first, he wanted the afterlife he can now taste.