Desperation

oldster on Jul 20, 2009

Tags: an excercise for a competition., Life, poem

A poem.

In a part of the planet unknown to man

Is an obsidian pool and small tongue of land

Growth lies stunted life is unfurled

This menacing pool is the eye of the world

The tongue is of hope contained within

Despair depravity and the foulest of sin

A solitary tree throws it’s arms to the sky

It’s supplication not acknowledged in the uncaring eye

The only reflected beauty it’s sterile surround

A whisper of leaves the rarest of sound

Undisturbed by a ripple and never a wave

Only the sun and the moon ever daring to bathe

Can nature leach sustenance from an obvious dearth

To restore balance and goodness to this impoverished earth

Through the tree sift all ugliness, oppression and pain

Start life over innocent and pure once again

Or is there a power unknown yet to me

Can enter the struggle and set all life free

While order and chaos do battle in this place

Life as we know it continues apace

Options will dwindle time quickly run out

To turn this insolvable situation about

We are desperate for a miracle to allay all our fear

While a leaf falls to replenish a silent tongue like a tear.

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Comments (22)

Duff D Moss on Jul 20, 2009
That was a very interesting poem. It was quite vivid and it instilled a sense of urgency in me – that time is short. I do feel that desperation. Well done, and thanks for contributing to the challenge. I hope you have a go next round too.
Katie Marie on Jul 20, 2009
Wonderful imagery. Enjoyed it very much.
Darla Cooke on Jul 20, 2009
Great poem!
BradONeill on Jul 20, 2009
Beautiful Rhythm and wonderful flow. I enjoyed this very much.
Alistair Briggs on Jul 20, 2009
Very vivid thoughts coming through from this one
Babyface Jam on Jul 21, 2009
If only I could write like this.. if only..
goodselfme on Jul 21, 2009
Very well penned piece with exqusite wordage.Great deep meaning given in every line.
Mikayla on Jul 24, 2009
This was beautifully written Oldster. You are quite spiritual and it shows through this wonderful portrayal of how you see life? i.e. even though there’s a lot of bad in the world, there’s always a place where faith and optimism thrive. Truly superb Oldster.
Theresa Johnson on Jul 30, 2009
very well wrote poem.
Shelly Barclay on Jul 30, 2009
Excellent work. You are a great poet.
maranatha on Jul 30, 2009
May we gather on that small tongue of land, and be the hope contained within.
littlemama76 on Jul 30, 2009
very interesting poem
David Crerand on Jul 30, 2009
the imagery rolls across the mind’s eye. Great flow.
Shebear on Jul 31, 2009
Good use of imagery, and a nice pattern of rhythm
cafftee on Aug 2, 2009
You paint a vivid picture here. A thought provoking entry to the challenge.
SunshineRay on Aug 14, 2009
I like your writing style!
paigeadelaide on Aug 18, 2009
mice imagery really nice poem thanks for sharing i enjoyed reading your work
XXElleXX on Aug 27, 2009
This poem was captivating and delicate Oldster. There was beauty in your imagery and using the metaphor of a ’solitary tree’ to call forth some deeper meaning was potent.
raptor22 on Oct 30, 2009
Another great write. Thanks for sharing.
Mila Marcos on Dec 27, 2009
Life can be hard but not all the time; suppressing feelings is damaging and it’s illogical to tap dance through despair; sometimes it is better not to rely on “hope” but to find happiness in the here and now. Lovely Oldster:)
lillyrose on Dec 31, 2009
Such a sad and meaningful poem, the words danced their own song! Lovely
Cynthia Cox on Feb 5, 2010
A flow of beauty and despair, an eloquent read of reality. wonderful works.

Desperation

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