One day, a close friend of mine said that it is the expectations that we set which make us either happy or unhappy. Quite true!! Isn’t it? Whenever you are joyous or sad, if you sit and think for a while, you will realize that it the expectations that you have about someone or something that made you feel so.

            All of us often set high expectations around the people we deal with or the things that we posses and feel let down when they are not up to our expectations. Let’s say that you switched jobs and today you are at the new office getting oriented. You would start thinking from the previous night or even from days before about how your new work place would be. One of the following combinations is sure to happen.

• 1) You will imagine it to be both brighter and cheerful than your previous organization.
• 2) You will worry as to how you will blend with the new colleagues.

• a) You find that there is lifeless atmosphere at the office and no one seems to notice you.
• b) You feel at home with the new team and office and wish you had joined this place long ago.

àYou will return with a gloomy face in the evening for combination 1 and a and 2 and a. àYou will be elated for both combination 1 and b OR 2 and b.

àYou will be sanguine for combination 1 and b and 2 and a.

            Let’s take another example. You bought a new bike by looking at the reviews given on the internet and feedback given by acquaintances. You are very much excited with your new possession and start setting expectations around it. Again one of the below would follow.

• 1) You find that your bike is much better than the reviews you read or heard about.
• 2) You do not find it as comfortable as you imagined after driving it for a few days.

à You will be very joyous for case 1 or you might feel let down for case 2. Had the thought occurred in your mind that your bike may not be as per the reviews, would you feel so bad? Being prepared for worst might sound negative, but it also helps in faster coping up with bad news.

            Our moods, thoughts, emotions, outbursts in a day depend on what we expect out of our relationships or the things we own. Whenever you feel unhappy, check if modifying your expectations lightens your mood. This will soon become a habit and a cheerful part of will emerge that sparkles with energy and enthusiasm needed for the rest of your day.