I gave up writing deep, dark, emotional poetry a long time ago. I used to write a lot of it, but it was so intensely subjective and personal that I never felt I wanted to share it. Many years ago a British lady named Pam Ayres wrote a series of poems about everyday events. These were comic pieces that she delivered in a TV programme and compiled into books. I love her work and find it very funny.
Pam is still touring UK, Australia, New Zealand and the rest of the world with her recitals and still drawing huge audiences. This is my attempt at a tribute to her fabulous work.
I am not nearly as good as Pam but I did manage a few verses:
Today was a sad day
One I hoped I’d never see
I heard the dying breaths
Of a pensioner PC.
Error it cried, error,
Oh not again, I sighed,
I’d seen those messages before,
I was convinced it lied.
Its temperature was rising
Virus found it said
But I had a shade of disbelief,
Somewhere inside my head.
And then it ate my article
The words it did ingest
And make a little tinkling sound
That made me quite depressed.
Then came tuneful PC sounds
Of whistle, bell and bleep
It slowly rattled to a halt
And put itself to sleep.
Then I tried the reset key
But it did not even blink
I panicked in my frightened state
And I could hardly think.
Old PC now has gone away
To the PC’s great beyond,
But I don’t care much anymore
I’m back here on Triond!
There is a copy of Pam’s Poem ‘I Wish I’d Looked After Me T*ts’ here if anyone would like to read it. Be warned though, it’s bit rude. Pam is such a funny lady and this is one of my favourites.
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