I am stepping outside my mind with this on,

There is so much more to tell than I can find the time to speak.

Ending where I once began and part of me is dead,

This is the way it has got to be and I’ll never let you meet the real me.

Asking me “why” now and suddenly I have no words I am mute,

Disillusioned and not quite ready to openly share my thoughts.

My life is so out of control and I’m feeling rather comfortable being lost,

A jaded smile and misguiding eyes make me seem like I know exactly where I stand.

At night my head don’t sleep, Thoughts of this tragic life circulate all hours of the night,

A constant battle of will versus instinct and in the process emotion is completely left behind.

A man filled with misery not willing to share with those around me, Turn your glance from me,

Alone I stand a broken man and there isn’t a chance to turn this around, to join me will only drag you down.

I have been to the depths of the darkest halls and I know what fate awaits me now,

All will never be forgiven and I am the fallen angel who has died inside.

One individual who lives in a fantasy world of lust, running short of luck thanks to dirty deeds,

Where was my shimmer of hope in all this, they never sounded the siren now I live merely half alive.

Fading fast and making up excuses Join me and entertain me just a while,

Do not attempt to bring me into your world; I’ll be gone with a blink of your eye.

I could want more than anything to hold you here forever, yet just another life would drown,

I want to leave behind all of this and pretend it’s never happened, But the guilt never lets you forget.

Devious, all is not as it seems I only let you see the side that I’m wishing could be,

If I told you all my secrets, Could there be forgiveness and would you still stand close to me?

Honesty is so over rated and I’ve always been that one to twist my words to succumb to you,

Nothing in this world could ever really be pure, I am no innocent but you have taken over this heart of mine and now it bleeds.

Into the nothing and I’m trying not to fall behind but everything moves at the speed of light,

All i ever wanted always finds a way to ruin to me, in the end even if unintentionally all the good gets left behind.

I could tell you just a few hidden aspects and I know it would fill you with rage,

I am under serving and I wouldn’t blame you if you kicked dirt into my eyes, I have this tendency to vanish, I’ve always hated goodbyes.

I may just be the leader of the pack when it comes to the hopeless,

Within you I saw something that makes it so hard not to change my mind.

Doubled up and my smile has become my permanent disguise,

Wanting this so badly yet at the end of the day I’m too afraid to bring tears to your eyes.

Unannounced and I’ve pulled you into my gravity,

I’ve lost myself I mean we all fall down; could you be able to make it through?

I have nothing to lose and everything to gain; does it make me evil to destroy other worlds?

So selfish and vindictive yet I could throw this all away just to know I’d have you in my world.