If I’ve gone backwards,
I have not meant to go backwards.
You have been nothing but a friend to me
and I love you
deep deep
like I love you my friend
so let me go forward
not backwards
if I’ve gone backwards.

You have been by my side
at the beginning
perhaps only because of intrigue
perhaps knowing nothing
but carrying the memory of a smile
but you have been by my side
not knowing if I’ve gone backwards
and I’ve always cared for you
very deep.

Time wandered on,
stages of life elapsed,
our friendship steady,
perhaps swaying back and forth
a boat in the ocean
(but push or pull)
I have been docked
in your eyes,
a sheer reflection of the sea.

My progression unleashed
into your palms,
a risk I took
willing to go backward,
praying to go forward
and finding in you
unconditional understanding.
An unconditional friendship.
I thank God for you.

So let me not downplay
your meaning to me
your presence, your every
ounce of support
because my fight against darkness
urges me to go backward
and if I have gone backward
I have not meant to go backwards.
You have been nothing but a friend to me
and I love you
deep deep
like I love you my friend
so let me go forward
not backwards
if I’ve gone backwards.