Out of some bizarre fantasy.

Lovely mansion do I see,
But there lies a simple decree.
Do not enter; you’re unwelcome.
Like a summer without a sun,
The moon hangs low in this house.
A place of one without a spouse.
Open the gate and receive the joy.
Don’t be selfish with your toys.
Will grace ever come to the silly mind.
The primitive battle makes us hard but kind.
Still I wait for one to appear,
But all I feel is the sting of your spears.
Take me home, arms of comfort.
I wish to stay in your court,
But the face of grace turns away.
I see you only fade to gray.
I tell the tale of a lonely castle.
As the protruding walls takes its toll.
Let me in, I scream in pain,
No happiness left to sustain.
Your castle lost, never to be found.
All that remains is a tiny guest house.

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Comments (18)
  • Joanna Maharis on Nov 12, 2008

    I like the lines “The primitive battle makes us hard but kind.” and “Still I wait for one to appear, But all I see is the sting of your spears.” Although all of the lines within the poem are so beautiful and filled with so much passion, these are the lines that I favor the most.

    Take Care,

    Joanna Maharis

  • Will Davis on Nov 12, 2008

    Yes the weirness meter stays high. Keep up the good work

  • lindalulu on Nov 12, 2008

    Great post!

  • ManofGod14 on Nov 12, 2008

    I am intrigued with every line written and poetically admire the excellence of your creative mind. The word selection is excellent and the concept extremely artistic.

  • xoxo on Nov 13, 2008

    I love the way you think. So, mystifying…

  • joystick7 on Nov 13, 2008

    Good Post!!

  • nobert soloria bermosa on Nov 15, 2008

    a beautiful piece of poetry,

  • poo on Nov 16, 2008

    Gr8 work and imagination, I loved it really :) let me know your views on my short stories and poems

  • Allison Jae on Nov 16, 2008

    This is a message for poo. I would to read your stories but I can’t find you. Please, message me.

  • Tesh on Nov 16, 2008

    Nice piece of work and enjoyed reading the post. keep it up! this is still just the first I have read (I just joined). invite you over to my page when you get the time.

  • Brian James on Nov 16, 2008

    I’ve always had trouble writing poetry. I wish I could do it.

  • Brian James on Nov 16, 2008

    Allison Jae, I think poo’s stuff is here… http://www.triond.com/users/poo

  • Launie and Melynda Sorrels on Nov 16, 2008

    You definately have insight for writing no one else can see. Good post.

  • jackalina on Nov 17, 2008

    I found ths poem well formed and had a good use of words through out, nice work.

  • gabbic1219 on Nov 18, 2008

    very descriptive,nicley put together
    it is a sound of loneliness but hope!
    feelings are deeply conveyed here allison!

  • Patrick Bernauw on Nov 18, 2008

    Wow, what a lot of comments! (But you do love them, don’t you?) – Great poem too… it has something mysterious and it’s very moody, I like that! Glad I’ve found you here on Authspot/Triond!

  • Jack Stanley on Nov 18, 2008

    Your work of poetry is nothing less than excellent.

  • Tate Morgan on Feb 21, 2009

    Allison I really liked this one It struck me as a string to my childhood

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