For twenty years

I felt ugly, ashamed

of who I was,

the creation God made.

I wrestled tragedy, trauma,

reason, cause

but came up with nothing;

I was broken, lost.

He said I was anointed;

good would cover evil,

but the more I loved through Him

I was betrayed by people.

I wanted to give up,

living this similarity with Job

but God’s Word said

I was worthy and should have hope.

So I prayed. I prayed,

I sought a mentor.

But God solely wanted

to provide and be my protector.

He called me to Guatemala

against my parent’s will,

by providing the funds.

In His arms I was confident still.

Now I come

and see why I am here:

to love those who are described

as the way I used to feel.

The puzzle pieces fit together,

since the day of my grief,

God has been weaving

the testimony of what I believe:

that sickness, disability,

injuries occur

to bring His glory

and display His love on earth.

My story is of

patience

forgiveness

love,

gifts I humbly accept

because they’re supernaturally from above!

I live a curse though,

of hearing the pain people see,

by not looking through God’s eyes

or understanding His grace; mercy.

I take their stares to heart,

the adjectives, the tear-filled eyes

one day, they too, will know -

everyone presses toward the prize.

Until that day, we all dance,

hear, see together in heaven,

I live a “cursed” blessing

of reaching those hurt by my brethren.