It wasn’t you, specifically;

I just vowed to speak to the next boy

Who carried my groceries out

Because it felt so strange to have

That done for me . . .

I thought some small kind of

Conversation

Might ease my awkward feelings.

I didn’t even think of it afterward.

I didn’t realize you were the one

I had spoken to . . . I didn’t remember

When I saw the next few times

And you smiled at me, looking hopeful

As though you would have liked to say “Hi”

But I am nervous, shy, and fear strangers;

Not stuck up, not playing games . . .

It took so long to get enough nerve

To speak to you in the first place.

And now, it’s been so long since that day . . .

So many times, I have vowed to myself

That I would be the one to smile at you

To speak to you . . .

But when I see you, you look away,

So I don’t, because I am afraid.

Almost everywhere I go, you are there

Is this too much to be coincidence?

Or is something trying to tell us something?

Am I reading too much into this?

And I think how ridiculous it is

That I can’t speak, that you can’t speak

I am too nervous to say hello . . .

Has this gone on for too long to hope?

Is it time to let this go?

Is it worth it still to try?

Is it time to give up?