Why do I keep longing for something that is not mine

And don’t feel fine

I long for my true love to hold me

Knowing that never can be

I want to run my finger through his hair

Feeling a real love affair

But for me only dreams remain

Love for me remains a pain

A man once claimed me

I was to blind to see

I ended up as a puppet to his terror

Longing to make no error

I wanted love and got stuff

And the curse that was enough

I longed for a little freedom to be myself

But got dominated by the other half

I wanted to live but could not find my way

Not knowing the love I had was being led astray

I lived in fear each day

For him not to come home I did pray

The other man I loved was miles apart

And just playing his part

He never wanted to be my lover I know

My true feelings I could not show

Love died in me on one end

And on the other side it would strand

I run for my life while I wanted to die

Asking myself why

My love for the other man kept me on my feet

And made loss repeat

I never touched him and I know I never will

But I long for it still

Dreams of romance should be a great affair

For me they are a nightmare

I hate to love because of this

Reality is loneliness

I gave up believing that the man I long for would ever see me as a woman

Instead of as a fan

I want to commit to somebody true

But always remain blue

I never gave myself away

Faithful I did stay

Also to a man that held my heart in terror

I still bleed for that error

Loving a man that will never be yours is a painful whishlist

From my experience more hurting than a fist

The physical pain I could endure

For my heartache I can not find a cure

I left all I had for a dream I longed to become true

But face that there will be no me and you